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Post by micanimble on Feb 26, 2012 21:59:41 GMT -5
{desc=Character proflie}Full Name: Zamine Leo "Kitten" Hyacinth Gender: Male Age: 16, DOB: August 6th, 1995
Appearance:The very first thing someone would notice about Zam is quite obvious... and that would be his tail and ears. Yes, he is in fact, a Pokemorph. A Liepard morph, to be specific. His ears and tail are coated with dark purple fur, with light blond triangular spots on them, the same color as his natural hair, which reaches his shoulders in a cascade of loose waves and curls. His eyes are the same green as those of a feral Liepard, and have been described more than once as 'piercing' or 'angry' even when he's feeling happy and cheerful. In terms of stature, he's not too unusual. He stands about 5'8" with a lithe build, not unlike that of a Liepard. His canine teeth are slightly elongated, but only by a centimeter or so longer than normal. His fingernails are lightly pointed, and his hands are dainty, yet dexterous.
Background: Zamine's birth was actually fairly straightforward, as compared to other Pokemorph's he'd heard about... It was so, because he is actually a second generation Pokemorph. He takes after his mother, meaning that she was a Pokemorph as well, which is how he came to be. When he'd asked about her birth, she answered with the fact that she didn't know. Zam's grandparents never told his mother, and he had even entertained the idea that she had been adopted by them. Rather than them being her biological parents.
He was raised with his parents in Serene Village, living next door to the Gym Leader, Steve, and was quite fond of the child growing up. Even babysitting a couple of times for him/her. He is currently one of the few people who knows Steve's true gender, though he's not telling.
Being a Pokemorph, Zamine experienced a little bit of bullying as a child. Luckily, he managed to avoid many schoolyard fights and beatings by being smarter and quicker than his assailants. And, not to mention, by making friends with older children who had Pokémon to look out for him. While it was by hanging out with these trainers that spurred his own interest in Pokemon, it was enhanced by him wanting to figure out his own origins. At the age of 16, his parents presented him with a Pokémon that they had adopted for him, a young Houndour that he named Barrow.
He's currently headed towards the Pokémon Ranger Station, to get his journey started and get a new Pokémon to help out his young Houndour.
Personality:Zamine is, for the most part, a pretty cheerful boy. Despite being bullied as a kid, he doesn't really have any major malfunctions about it, save for a high level of sympathy. He's somewhat shallow, but not in terms of who he keeps as friends... but he'll base his potential relationships first on physical attractiveness, and second on personality... Like most people in existence.
He's also, if you're decent and telling, pretty obviously a bit gay. He's by no means a complete flamer, but he has a slight femininity to his gait and to his speech patterns... He's not outrightly obvious, but he's one of those people you wonder about. However, he's not in the closet. He's proud of who he is, and if you ask him, he'll answer. Otherwise, it's not a big deal to him.
Info: He has a Houndour puppy with him as his current companion, and is headed to the Ranger Station to get an additional Pokémon to help protect and train Barrow, as well as himself. He's very open about most topics of conversation, and is an affectionate, slightly huggy person.
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Post by Sp❣rit on Feb 26, 2012 23:39:28 GMT -5
Hi, I'm Spirit. <3 First I wanna say welcome to Cheyenne! I'm here to help you with your character to help open up roleplaying possibilities so you aren't restricted to roleplaying journey threads, which admittedly gets boring after a certain point. You seem like you're a good roleplayer, and my only complaint grammar/punctuation wise is to cut down on the commas a bit. You use them so much in spots where you don't even need them, so keep an eye out for that!
So I want to try and flesh him out a little more as a character, if that's alright with you. The last thing I want is for people to get bored with their characters and have them start over, so that's why I'm here~! Let's start with the background to give him some things to think about whenever you're RPing him. All you have to do is answer these questions and put them in the right spot in your app, which should make him less 2-D.
How intelligent was he in school?
How wealthy was his family?
Are these any beliefs that his family has that he agrees with? Beliefs he disagrees with?
Why was he picked on exactly? Do these traits still carry over to the person he is today? Is he still sensitive to this topic?
I feel like the thing with Steve is a bit random, so I'm not sure where you're going with it. Is there something in particular that he learned to Steve that you had in mind? Maybe something relating to his sexuality?
For his personality, I feel like he needs traits that make him more of a person. You're just saying he's kind of like an average joe, just with a lot more characters.
I like your second paragraph, but you might want to rewrite the first one. Let's just try with how he acts around people for starters.
How does he treat strangers?
How does he act around people he doesn't trust?
How is he with his friends? Is he the leader type? Does he follow? What kind of role does he usually take in groups?
What's it take to get on his bad side?
What can't he stand in a person? Alternatively, what does he like in a person?
What is the most important thing to him in his life?
Pre-Starter:
In order to have a pre-starter, we're going to need a bonding experience of some kind with the Pokémon. It should be at least a paragraph long so we can understand why you get to keep this choice uncommon Pokémon. An easier route would be to try the lab or the ranger station if you don't want to add to your app. <3 We just need to see you convince us why your character needs this Houndour.
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Post by micanimble on Feb 27, 2012 0:35:00 GMT -5
Okay.... first of all... step back a bit.
I appreciate the offer to help. Thank you very much. I've been roleplaying for nigh-on... A long-ass time. I've been in forum roleplaying probably around 4 years or so and other styles for longer still.
I suppose I could expand on his intellect and family in his background, I'll change that I suppose.
About the bullying, I assumed that Pokemorphs weren't exactly commonplace in the universe, as I was told by the person who recommended me to the site, so I assumed that they would be ridiculed by children in elementary school, being so different from the other children.
I would assume that most adults are more appropriate involving the hybrids, so I don't think he'd continue to be bullied very much.
As for personality traits, I can probably expand on that. I'll try at least.
I'll expand on everything, but I currently don't have the mental focus to do such. It'll be a later time.
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Post by Sp❣rit on Feb 27, 2012 1:26:08 GMT -5
I'm sure you're experienced but writing is a learning process! We're all learning. Heck, Draa is always getting on me like the grammar po-po. I'm not giving you a personal attack in any way, though you might feel like I'm putting you down. Just take it easy, come back in a day, and think it over when you've calmed down a little.
Cheyenne is a pretty chill place, so there's no reason to bring out the claws when I'm trying to help you get your application accepted. <3 Accept help and leaaarn, brother.
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Post by micanimble on Mar 1, 2012 1:49:07 GMT -5
Version two. Here goes.
Full Name: Zamine Leo "Kitten" Hyacinth Gender: Male Age: 16, DOB: August 6th, 1995
Appearance:The very first thing someone would notice about Zam is quite obvious... and that would be his tail and ears. Yes, he is, in fact, a Pokemorph. A Liepard morph to be specific. His ears and tail are coated with dark purple fur with light blond triangular spots on them, the same color as his natural hair which reaches his shoulders in a cascade of loose waves and curls. His eyes are the same green as those of a feral Liepard and have been described more than once as 'piercing'. In terms of stature, he's not too unusual. He stands about 5'8" with a lithe build not unlike that of a Liepard. His canine teeth are slightly elongated, but only by a centimeter or so longer than normal. His fingernails are lightly pointed and his hands are dainty yet dexterous.
Background: Zamine's birth was actually fairly straightforward, as compared to other Pokemorph's he'd heard about... It was so, because he is actually a second generation Pokemorph. He takes after his mother, meaning that she was a Pokemorph as well, which is how he came to be. When he'd asked about her birth, she answered with the fact that she didn't know. Zam's grandparents never told his mother, and she had even entertained the idea that she had been adopted by them. Rather than them being her biological parents.
He was raised with his parents in Serene Village where his father was a Gym Trainer for many years, even since before Steve, the current Gym Leader, was born. Zamine was exposed to Pokémon since birth, particularly Dark-Type Pokemon, since those were the favored types of both his Mother and Father. As such he always had an affinity towards them himself, especially since he was technically part Dark-Type Pokémon himself. Being a Pokemorph Zamine experienced a little bit of bullying as a child. As is often the case, children will often hone in on the odd, the unique, and the different and use them as living targets for their hateful words and actions. Luckily, he managed to avoid many schoolyard fights and beatings by being smarter and quicker than his assailants. And not to mention by making friends with older children who were more than glad to use their Pokémon to help look out for him. It was these friends of his that urged him to become a Pokémon trainer. At the age of 16, his parents presented him with a Pokémon that they had bred for him from their own Pokemon, a young Houndour that he named Barrow.
He's currently headed towards the Pokémon Ranger Station, to get his journey started and get a new Pokémon to help out his young Houndour.
Personality:Zamine is a pretty cheerful young man. Even during his formative years he'd always been a happy-go-lucky child. He'd never hold a grudge against anyone for more than a couple of days, often being completely unable to not forgive them when they apologized... though there were a few exceptions on the part of one or two secrets being told against his will.
If you're decent at telling things about people, then you'd be able to tell that he's pretty obviously a bit gay. He's by no means a complete flamer but he has a slight femininity to his gait and to his speech patterns... But he's not outrightly obvious. He's one of those people you wonder about but can never really be sure of. However he's not in the closet. He's proud of who he is and if you ask him he'll answer. Otherwise it's not a big deal to him.
When he meets new people he likes to exert a restrained optimism. He hopes that they'll be friendly and kindhearted but he knows how people can be, and often are. He's well aware that lots of Pokémon Trainers have very high opinions of themselves, so he likes to conduct himself with a slight sense of modesty; taking both wins and losses with a calm air.
Should someone break his trust, or should Zamine not trust them in the first place, then that person won't get more than two words at a time from the young man. Trust is a big deal to the Pokemorph, something easily given but incredibly hard to get back once gone.
Info: He has a Houndour puppy with him as his current companion; the one that his parents gave to him for his 16th birthday present and is headed to the Ranger Station to get an additional Pokémon to help protect and train Barrow as well as himself. He's very open about most topics of conversation and is a rather affectionate and slightly huggy person.
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Post by Sp❣rit on Mar 1, 2012 8:54:13 GMT -5
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Post by micanimble on Mar 1, 2012 21:13:37 GMT -5
So, you're denying my pre-starter because I don't have some deep and intricate, heart-wrenching back-story involving some important life-changing event involving him and the Houndour.
Not everything needs to have some amazing backstory behind it. He's bringing the Houndour with him, because his parents bred it specifically for him for his birthday. It's a link back to his family while he's out on his journey, and he loves it.
Why can't someone have a non-eventful, simple way they met their first Pokemon? Okay, maybe he doesn't NEED the Houndour, but he wants it. It makes him happy, and it's meaningful to him. You want a story? Fine.
Zamine still remembers the day that his Houndour hatched for him. He had just turned 16 a few days prior and his parents had given him the egg for his birthday. He had expressed his wish to get his Pokemon License, and was waiting on the paperwork to go through before he could get his permit.
It was a warm day in early September and he was laying on his bed, the egg between his legs as he read a book in the light of the sun shining through his window. His tail was kept curled around the egg keeping it close to the warmth of his body. Just as he was finishing a chapter he felt it start to shake and squirm lightly. He marked his page and turned over, holding the egg in his hands and looking down as it started to crack and shake, the shell slowly giving way to the small form of a dark, canine Pokemon.
The egg had hatched right in his hands... The teenaged Pokemorph couldn't help but smile at the tiny Houndour, lifting it up and looking into its eyes and smiling as it opened them. The tiny male Houndour pup looked at him, letting out a small pitiful yip and then licked his nose.
Zamine held the little Pokemon in his arms, carefully holding it and grabbing a small blanket to wrap it in... He didn't let go of the thing for almost four hours, keeping it close to him and protecting it. Since then Zamine has hardly let Barrow out of his line-of-sight if he can help it. The little Houndour either in his pokeball with Zamine, or in his arms.
Is that better? Is that what you wanted? Now can I have my pre-starter?
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Post by Sp❣rit on Mar 1, 2012 23:12:50 GMT -5
[D] for douche. Also 'D' for delete. Cheyenne is not the place for you.
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